Archive for February, 2010

This made me laugh

Posted: February 21, 2010 in Uncategorized

I saw an article about footballer Ashley Cole and his wife Cheryl’s marital problems on the front of the Sun this morning.

Ashley cheated on her with some woman, and if I recall correctly (I don’t keep up with the lives of chav celebrities much) this wasn’t the first time.

What made me laugh was this: “Seething Cheryl Cole has slapped cheating hubby Ashley with a six-month sex ban”. Yes, her response to his cheating is to not have sex with him for six months, in order to fix their marriage. Fucking genius.

People really need to wake up. This is the 21st century. Sex and romance are no longer mysterious and spiritual things; evolutionary psychology has peeled away the layers of mystique so all that is now left is the cold hard truth. Seeing as sex and love are two very important things in people’s lives it really amazes me that this knowledge has not penetrated that more deeply into society’s conciousness.

I guess the truth is that people don’t really like the truth when it comes down to it. I’ve come to realise that if you want to annoy someone, then tell them a nasty little lie. If you want to upset them to the point that they never speak to you again, then tell them the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

So what’s the truth in this situation? Well, dear reader, let me break it down for you.

Women are attracted to men with high status. Status can manifest itself in a number of different ways. Here are some of the main ones:

1. Being a leader of men
2. Being wealthy
3. Being part of a large social group / many social groups
4. Fame, either in terms of being a celebrity or to a lesser extent just being that bloke that seems to know everyone in the bar

How many women want a man and how easily a man can bed the women that want him is directly related to how highly he scores in each of the above categories. Think of a shy, introverted guy. He may be the nicest guy in the world, but he never gets laid. This always seems to confound men, so let’s do a status test on Mr. Nice Guy(tm) introvert to see how he stacks up in the ways which really count in the mating game:

1. Leader of men: No. If you’re shy, how can you hope to be a leader?
2. Being wealthy: Maybe, maybe not.
3. Being part of a large social group: No, introverts aren’t sociable.
4. Fame: A shy guy is hardly the type of person that everyone knows.

This shows us that unless the nice but shy guy is rich, his dating market value is basically 0.

“But you said he was nice!”, I hear you cry. “Doesn’t that count for anything”? No. Not when it comes to selecting a mate. This may be important when a girl chooses to be friends with a guy, but choosing a lover is different. When it comes to mate selection, a high value guy, regardless of whether his nice or not beats a low value guy who’s the nicest man you could meet. This is why gangsters get lots of women despite not being in anyway nice. They are leaders of men, wealthy and often quite famous. ‘Nice’ just isn’t a factor either way when choosing who people fuck. If you guys want to bitch about this, let me point out your hypocrisy: Would you rather bang the fat 4 who’s the nicest girl in the world or the HB10 who’s a bit of a bitch? Hmm. Now let that sink in and shut the fuck up.

So back to Ashley Cole. How does he stack up:

1. Leader of men: Footballer supporters are like huge tribes with the club’s top players being their ‘leaders’. He scores basically 100% on this one.
2. Being wealthy: I’m not sure how much he earns exactly, but it’s in the millions per year. He’ll be in the top 0.001% of the population in terms of wealth for sure. I’d say he scores around 99% here. He probably can’t afford a private jet like a billionaire, but he’s rich enough to impress most people.
3. Being part of a large social group: This guy gets invited to top celebrity parties all of the time. 100%.
4. Fame: He’s one of the most famous people in the UK. If he went to a country where football isn’t a big deal (i.e. the US) he wouldn’t stack up as well. In the UK the only people who beat him on this would be top US film stars, say Tom Cruise. When playing on home turf I’m going to say 100%.

So Ashley Cole has a mate value of close to 100%. This makes him one of the most desirable men in the country. He can have almost any women he wants, and often has to put in little effort to get her. With this established, let’s look at the second part of the equation. This is what science (and common fucking sense) shows us are the optimal mating strategies.

Women can only produce one baby per 9 month period (excluding twins, triplets). In contrast to this men can theoretically sire hundreds of babies per year. Given this the optimal mating strategy for men and women is very different. Women need to be selective about who they sleep with, so when they make a commitment to spend 9 months pregnant during which time they can’t have any other kids, they know that the child comes from good genetic stock. In other words it is important for women to go for quality over quantity when it comes to choosing their lovers. On the other hand, since men can reproduce so often it makes sense for them to go for quantity over quality of mate. If you have 100 children born to a low quality mate there’s still more chance of one of them surviving than the chance of one child born to a high quality mate. Also mating with as many partners as possible means the man’s offspring will have as much genetic variety as possible, increasing the chances of hitting upon a combination of genes which are good for survival.

tl;dr: Due to the differences in the way men and women reproduce, men are hard wired for polygamy, women for monogamy.

So with Ashley Coal we have a naturally polygamous man who can have nearly any women he wants with ease. The only possible way his wife could have of controlling his natural urge to sleep with as many women as possible is to fuck him so often his prostrate hurts. Instead she bans him from having sex with her. For six months. Now you can see why this made me laugh.

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Fun, fun, fun

Posted: February 11, 2010 in Uncategorized
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When scouring the message boards looking for wingmen or meeting new wingmen for the first time, I find I hear one thing repeated time and time again: “I’m just doing this to have fun”.

People just starting out in game always seem to go out of their way to tell you that having fun is, to them, the most important thing about learning game. I very much disagree with this attitude, and here’s why:

1. Although having and being fun may be a prerequisite to getting laid, that alone won’t get you laid regularly. Back in my AFC days (all of 4 weeks ago), I used to go out with my mates and have fun. Despite this I never got laid on a regular basis. Whether you like it or not, girls are fussy about who the sleep with, so your going to have to be more than just fun if you are to stand out from the crowd of dozens of other men that a given women knows she can fuck if she so pleases.

2. How many times have you seen a pro athlete or hugely successful business man interviewed, and they say, “I never try hard at what I do. Success just sort of happens to me”. I haven’t really heard that one often dear reader. I usually hear how focused their approach to achieving success in their chosen field was.

In many areas of life I have often seen people enter into many new endeavours. Whether it’s business, martial arts, weight training or poker, I notice the same thing happening: people who go take a laissez faire attitude have little success and end up quitting. People who take their new pursuit very seriously and pursue it with such zeal that you’d almost think their life depended on it often find great success comes their way.

3. People use the whole “just having fun” thing as a safety net to protect their ego when they fail. If they only open 10 women in a month they can tell themselves that it does not matter; they’re only doing it to have fun after all. I say fuck that. This attitude is the reserve of spineless pussies.

If you take game seriously you will set goals. If you do not meet those goals and you are taking game seriously then this will make you unhappy. People will tell you this is a bad thing. They are wrong. Unhappiness is our mind’s way of driving us to success. If we are happy with our current situation we will never be driven to change it. Allow unhappiness into your life by setting realistic goals and you will be motivated to achieve success. An example of this is my current goal to open 50 sets this month. Since I had a poor weekend of gaming last weekend (I was to busy having dun to open sets…) I have only opened 20 sets so far this month. This makes me sad. I can’t stand the thought of missing my target. This is such a great motivator that I can foresee myself being on fire this weekend. Whereas previously I have found any excuse not to open a set, I think this weekend will be different. The fact that I am letting my target slip out of my grasp will mean I will ignore all the perceived difficulties in opening a given set and just fucking go for it.

4. To have fun, you have to be doing something fun. I have met many newbie PUAs over the past months who try and talk themselves into having fun. They stand on a bar talking about how they have to get into the mood to be having fun quickly, because that’s important for their game. They essentially try to talk themselves into having fun. This rarely seems to work, and their obsession with having fun paradoxically stops them having fun.

The human brain isn’t fooled easily. The only real way to have fun is to do something fun. You know what’s a fun thing to do when your in a bar? Practising game. True opening sets can be daunting. Once you’re in set though you will be having a good time. I guarantee this. Talking to beautiful women is a fucking biologically certified way for a man to have fun. When you’re talking to a sexy lady, your animal brain realises you are increasing your chances to replication, and is kind enough to reward you with a shot of endorphins which make you happy. This means that talking to a pretty girl is almost the same in some ways as doing a line of coke, only the former won’t lead to a blocked up nose . So if you want to have fun, focus on opening sets, not talking yourself into having fun.

In summary, if you want to be successful at game you do have to take it seriousy. Stop making excuses about just wanting to have fun. Get out there and practise your game. You’ll thank me in the long run.

The other night I learned the importance of two things when it comes to game: Body language and pre-selection.

Now I know these things are often written about in books and blogs, but I don’t think you can really appreciate the importance of certain things until you see them in effect in front of your very eyes.

After an evening of sarging around Oxford Cirus last night I headed into McDonalds for some food (god forgive me). As I was coming in a classy blonde HB10 was leaving. As much as I love HB10s what really caught my attention was the guy she was leaving with.

He was slightly above average looking, well dressed and well groomed. The only thing that was more confident than the look on his face was the slight swagger in his walk. I saw the HB first, thought, “I wonder what kind of guy gets to fuck her”, and he was the answer to that question.

I only observed him for maybe 2 – 3 seconds, but in this time it was obvious to me that:

  • He was very confident
  • He was a bit of a bad boy, but probably without actually being an ex-con or anything like that
  • He fucks beautiful women

I don’t know if he’s nice, intelligent, funny, well educated or what his world views are. I don’t know if he’s the type of person that will do anything for a friend or if he’s sure to stab them in the back on day. I never even heard him speak so I sure as hell don’t know if he’s got anything interesting to say. All I had on him was his body language and some social proof / pre-selection, but I knew he was a HB fucking bad boy alpha male.

This tells us a lot about what is and isn’t important when it comes to getting laid. A guy’s looks, sense of humour, integrity and intellegence don’t seem to matter as nearly as much as people think. How you walk through the world trumps all of these things.

The thing is, I have made a huge assumption here. He wasn’t holding the girls hand or anything like that. They could have just been friends, or even brother and sister. The thing is, I assumed he was fucking her because it just fits. The way he carried himself makes him look like the kind of guy you can imagine a super hot babe dating.

Lets carry this a bit further. If I see him and assume he’s fucking blondie, how is a girl going to perceive what I saw. I think most girls thought processes (at an almost subconcious level) would go like this: “He’s obviously dating that really attractive girl. If he’s the kind of guy that an attractive girl would want to date then he must be the kind of guy I want to date. And he has that whole sexy bad boy swagger too. I really need some cock…”.

Pre-selection + good body language = instant attraction

Many people I have spoken too have told me about naturals they know. People that have never studied pickup but who sleep with dozens of beautiful women. Whenever they talk about seeing them in action, everyone says the same thing: They don’t seem to say or do anything that different or special.

As soon as a natural approaches a set, even before he’s said a word he’ll have their attention. When he does start speaking the girls are instantly leaning in, hooked on his every word, even if what he’s actually saying is unremarkable. The puppy dog eyes soon follow, and before you know it he’s slapping one of them on the ass shouting, “You like that don’t you, bitch?” as he fucks her doggie style. People don’t seem quite sure why this happens. How can he hook a set without saying a word. Pheromones? Luck? Many people agree that betas can’t replicate this. Even some mid level PUAs think this. I disagree, I think it’s all in the body language and cheeky look on the guys face. Too many PUAs have gone from loser to lover for me to believe other people can’t learn to be like the natural.

So next time you open a set, remember the McDonalds alpha bad boy. In just two seconds, only two seconds, I knew he was the type of man beautiful women want to fuck. Is your next set going to know that about you before you even open your mouth?

Oxford Circus street game

Posted: February 3, 2010 in Uncategorized
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So I promised you all a post on my street game session (aka my epic street game fail), and here it is.

I meet a couple of new Wings at Oxford Circus on Thursday night.  For those of you who don’t know what Oxford Circus is, it’s basically a cross section of two major roads, one of which being Oxford Street which is one of the big 3 shopping streets in London’s West End. On a really good weekend up to 1 million people will pass through Oxford Circus. An area with that much foot traffic is obviously target rich, so let the game commence…

Oxford Circus

Oxford Circus - A target rich venue in London's West End

My two partners in crime for the night were BankBoy and Jester. Jester’s a short black guy in his 20’s who seemed to have boundless energy. BankBoy’s 30, and works (unsurprisingly) in a bank.

There are 4 tube station exits at each corner of the Oxford Circus intersection. Plenty of people hang around there so that’s where we decided to make our approaches.

Jester was unstoppable. He was a fucking opening machine. This was his first ever sarge and he opened like a pro. He just seemed to have boundless energy, and his approaches to women conveyed his sense of fun, while still making them feel comfortable. BankBoy was slightly more nervous, but still fun and made plenty of approaches. I was still Mr. Approach Anxiety, but still managed 5 approaches myself.

We were using the following openers:

  • Cigarette opener: Just asking for a light, then trying to start a conversation.
  • You look like a nice person, will you shelter me under your umbrella (it was raining)
  • You’re going to have to entertain me until my friends get here
  • I just saw you passing buy, and I had to stop you and tell you I really like you’re style (on a moving target)
  • To a girl on her mobile, mouthing the words, “Are you going to be long”. If she hangs up quickly, start by saying, “I was just passing and really wanted to say hi”

The two openers which seemed to work the best are the phone one and the “I really like your style one”. The phone one shocks them (in a good way) because they assume you have something really important to tell them, it shows confidence, and it’s quite a way removed from a ‘traditional’ chat up line. The style one obviously plays right to a girl’s ego, feeding it a massive dollop of ice cream. Girl’s get told they’re hot all the time, but complementing their fashion sense allows you to pay a compliment whilst not appearing to be like all the other guys that hit on them.

My approaches where as follows:

  • Can I get a light opener on a 6: Tried to chat to her about what she’d been up to that day, she was unresponsive
  • Can I get a light opener on a 9: Tried the old, “I didn’t think anyone still smoked anymore”. She completely blew me out.
  • “You’re going to have to entertain me till my friends get here” on a 7:  She looked absolutely shocked at first. Think rabbit in the headlights kind of look. I moved past this and just kept talking. Chatted to her for about five minutes. Her parents were from Lancashire but she was brought up in Germany, so her accent made her sound like the love child of a farm girl and a Gestapo officer, so I negged her about that a bit. Got some IOIs (she re initiated conversation a couple of times when it lagged and also gave me a cigarette. I must have been doing OK because Jester waved his phone at me from a distance to try and get me to number close. It turned out she was flying out to Germany the next day, so I didn’t bother. This approach was encouraging though.
  • Asked a 9 if I could shelter under her umbrella. She seemed weary but I insisted, and came off as really creepy. I think I pushed too hard and encroached too far into her personal space. We ended up chatting about mobile phone packages (yes, I am London’s greatest Lothario, dear reader). You know in the movies where the teenage guy is talking to the super hot girl and he gets tongue tied to great comic effect, and your shouting at the screen, “WTF are you doing, you loser?”? Well, this happened to me. I ended up asking her how big her package was, then saying, “It wasn’t meant to come out like that!”. Don’t ask. Epic fail.
  • Asked a tall 8 what she thought about shorter guys. Rabbit in the head lines look again. I supplicated by saying it doesn’t matter and she doesn’t need to answer. This is a mistake as it shows a weakness on my part, like I’m overly concerned about the fact I’ve taken her out of her comfort zone. She finally replied, “My mother told me never to trust a man with short legs”. I fired back with, “What happen’s if he’s got normal length legs but a short body?”. That made her laugh but I was ultimately unable to get a conversation going.

So not a complete disaster, but close. Should be doing the same thing this week, and hope to see some improvement. I’m still not really looking for a number close yet, just to get confident at opening.

Some things I learned from this:

  • Girls aren’t used to being approached on the street with quick, confident openers in the same way they are when they’re in a bar. If they look a bit surprised and are speechless when you open, don’t worry. It doesn’t mean you’ve screwed up, it just means you’ve surprised them. This is a good thing. People want excitement. Most people lead boring lives; a good opener on the street could well be the highlight of a girls day.
  • You are doing to have to do 90% of the talking if you want to get a conversation going. Bombarding her with questions seems needy and seems to put girls off. This is where various routines come in handy. These routines can be stacked to get a great conversation going. This is too advanced for me at the moment. I’m just focusing on overcoming my approach anxiety.
  • If you are too nervous when approaching and / or intrude into a girls personal space too much, you’re going to freak her out. Confidence will come with repeated exposure to approaching hot women.

They’ll be another post later in the week about some night game I did on Saturday. I meet some great people and found a great opener, I can’t wait to tell you all about it.