I’m thinking of giving up game

Posted: August 8, 2011 in Uncategorized

After the first week of this month went terribly for me in terms of game (more on this is a future post), I’m seriously considering giving up on cold approach. I’d still use online game.

What got me thinking this? Taking a good hard look at the effort I’m putting into game in terms of hours and emotion invested in it, and comparing this effort to the results. Lets look at the effort first.

When it comes to cold approach, i trained it for about 6 months this year, and the same last year. At an average of 10 hours spent a week that’s 500 hours of field time clocked up (an I’d guess only 200 – 300 approaches in this time, which is the main problem). That’s a lot of time. Then there’s the emotional investment. Placing all my hope of a truly fulfilling sex life on game. Taking all of the rejections (of which there must have been almost 300). This would be OK, if the results were epic too. Lets look at the results and see…

In short the results haven’t been epic. Two lays, one with a 5 and one with a 6, about 7 day 2s and about half a dozen kcloses. From 500 hours. Fuck that shit.

In terms of results, there seems little point in carrying on. I think if I were to do the maths, I actually have a hit rate in terms of fcloses and kcloses very similar to what I had when I was 17/18 and going out on the pull, not knowing any game.

“But you’ll get better!” I hear you cry. That’s just it. I’m not improving. I’ve never once, in 12 months and 500 hours been happy with the number / quality of approaches I’ve done in a session. Last week I did just 8 approaches, with very little of it hooking well. I’d estimate that I spent maybe 20 minutes total in sets I opened last week. No closes, obviously. That’s noob level pickup at best. That’s game for Omega males. In all this time I have been unable to push myself to the point where I’m consistently opening a good number of sets per night.

Then there’s what happens in set. I’m letting far too many sets die when I let the conversation dwindle which leads to the girl walking off. This used to be because I had nothing to say. Now I can think of things, but my inner introvert kicks in, and I just can’t be bothered to make conversation. I don’t see this changing any time soon.

Poor results + lack of progress = waste of time and effort

Will speak to my mentor again soon if I can, and get his take on this. The truth is I’m not going to carry on with something so unproductive and draining.

———————————————
Stats since 1st August:
8 approaches
0 number closes
0 kiss closes
0 f closes

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Comments
  1. the admiral says:

    all the techniques you learned came from the result of hundreds of PUAs failing again and again until they finally hit gold. think of it this way, you will never fail as much as they did and for that you should thank them.

    the few times you have succeeded how did it feel. i’m not in a position to learn game but i feel like it’d be a huge high succeeding with women.

  2. PUA Vault says:

    I don’t understand how one can ‘quit game’ – you still need to talk to girls, whether you do cold approach or not, unless you plan on being a monk.

    • extasio says:

      Okay buddy, as one of your regular wings, I will comment on this but it will be hard and direct criticism.

      As you already know, you are not opening enough. This is your major problem in terms of technique. The reasons why you are not opening more are IMO:

      – You are too much in your head. You analyze and play too much with numbers and statistics when you are out. I enjoy talking with you about game stuff. This is a nice beginning for the evening but after this warm up you should just open your sets and stop analyzing. The only thing I think is how do I open the next set and, often, I just do it in the moment without any thinking.
      – Often, you don’t enjoy being out. Your default state should be that you are having a fun night out no matter how much you pull. I had recently evenings where I just got rejected. No close, at all! And still me and my wings had shit loads of fun by doing some funny pranks and some other crazy stuff such that I would call it a damn good evening!
      – You waste your resources sometimes (remember the strip club thing).

      This is a as good as I can describe it but I am not an inner game expert, I am no good motivator unfortunately and I don’t know exactly how you could change the issues listed above.
      Concrete advice I can give you:
      – Invest some money to get your inner game sorted. First address coming to my mind is Skeletor (good reputation, fair prices).
      – Stop smoking.
      – Go to gym regularly to improve your body shape (it’s average presently).

      The first point seems to be the by far most important (and also by far more important than changing some minor outer stuff as buying elevator shoes). Hope you are not offended by anything. There are a lot of good things about you personally and gamewise of course as well that I don’t mention here.

      Extasio

  3. Alpha says:

    From one PUA to another:

    We all have these moments man. I remember mine. I remember going to a bar alone and thinking about how I needed to give up game and go back to being a chump. And I remember watching a beta shotgun a table of HBs, buy at least $100 worth of alcohol for them, and get nothing. A PUA was sitting near by, and used the beta’s failure as an opener and got a number in about 2 minutes.

    I told myself something when I saw that, something that changed my game and my outlook on women forever. I repeat it to myself every day and it keeps me going, and now I will pass it on to you:

    Sack up!

    I want you to grab your balls, remember that they’re there, and go get you some ass! You’re a PUA, not some chump bitch – so don’t whine when you could be getting ass.

  4. LexIcon says:

    Well, unlike the other comments, I agree, you should definitely give it up. Cold Approach is a definite waste of time, and for all the years I’ve been doing Pickup I’ve rarely seen anyone be able to make much of it, and those guys mainly were good looking or were natural extroverts.

    Personally, I just don’t like “forcing myself” to approach women, or “sacking up”, and find it better to find a method that AGREES WITH ME, rather than hitting my head against the wall wondering why another guy’s style of game doesn’t work for me.

    I mainly do social game and online game. When I go out it’s to have fun with friends and mainly meet women through them, and I definitely don’t lurch around seeing how many women I can waste my time creeping out.

  5. beyondthecloud9 says:

    hey, just spot the blog entry online, and in the world of wordpress hoping to meet some new people. thanks

  6. Bhodisatta says:

    Hi mate. Yes I think if you aren’t enjoying your current game activities then you should stop. Don’t keep hammering away. Grinding away at cold approach pickup can actually wear you down. However I don’t think you should ‘give up game’ but I think you should take a more subtle and holistic approach. I would suggest considering the following:

    -Channel your energies into resolving your work and cash situation. Your lack of resources betatizes you. I.T. is a noble profession and one of the few areas where a man can enjoy building things and getting well paid for it so there’s no need to neccessarily radically change careers unless you want to. Given your skillset you could perhaps move to a more media/trendy type company where it is more social and there are more birds. The way I see I.T. then you should be doing one of the following:
    a) Working in a small company full of braniacs where you do fascinating technical work and learn huge amounts
    b) Working in a media/trendy type company and enjoying the environment
    c) Working in an investment bank, probably hating it, but earning enormous amounts of money
    …and if you’re not then you’re missing the boat.
    -Find several extremely good mates who have a similar worldview and have ‘taken the red pill’ with regards to feminism, game, politics etc and are supportive rather than try to subtly compete with you for women. The number one betatizing thing in most men’s life is lack of compadres.
    -Work on your value. Get very fit, lose a lot of weight, learn to dance, read widely, start to write more, get your flat nice and tidy and stylish, learn to cook, give value to others, volunteer somewhere, learn to box, etc, etc.
    -Do you enjoy bars? If so then with your newfound cash and buddies go do bargame once/twice a week. Act as a team. Make sure you can have a great night irrespective of game.
    -Engage in a systematic campaign of online dating.
    -Build up a social circle. You have to graft at this and you do it through non-work activities. If you do some of the above then this should start to come together.

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