Posted: September 15, 2011 in Uncategorized
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As usual myself and one wing (only my second time out with this guy) arrive at the club just before 9 to avoid paying the cover charge or hassle getting in. It’s already fairly busy at this time, so I have a feeling it’s going to be a good night.

We kick back and have a beer. My wing is young and eager to get going. I tell him I’m not going to bother opening sets until 10pm. Approaching and running a set can sap your energy, an I don’t want to burn out before prime time (11:30 – 1:30 IMO). I’ve seen so many wings arrive before 9, run around like mad things opening sets for a couple of hours, then bail before midnight because they get tired. This can get you some telephone numbers, but won’t get you an SNL.

My wing opens a passing 2 set as we’re stood by the bar by calling them over. There’s a tall blonde and a short brunette. I take the short brunette. We banter for a bit, and she seems interested with some IOIs coming my way, but I fuck up my response to a shit test and it dies:

Her: We’re in the White Room

Me: Posh. Do you have a big ice bucket full of champagne? That’s what they usually have in there.

Her: Yeah, but I don’t like it. I prefer vodka.

Me: I was just going to say I bet you prefer vodka. I can tell.

Her: So are you saying I’m not sophisticated?

I gave her what was supposed to be a faux guilty look, but I may have just looked like she had caught me out, therefore failing the shit test. In retrospect I should have ignored her question, grabbed her hand saying, “Show me how you move”, then spun her round, pulling her in for the lock in. Bit gamey but would pass the shit test and take the set forward at the same time.

The girls make their excuses and rejoin their friends. At this point a group of girls enters the club. One of them, an HB6 is dancing in a very sexual way as she walks by. We lock eyes for a couple of seconds. She is DTF and attracted to me, so I should definitely open her. I decide the time isn’t right yet. It’s still too early, so I let her walk on by. We’ll call her HBSexyLilDancer. I have a feeling (in my loins) that I’ll be seeing her later.

My wing opens another set in the smoking area which doesn’t come to much. Back in the club, and fast approaching 10pm I decide it’s time to open my first set, so I’m keeping my eyes open. At this time the clubs still only at 1/3rd capacity, so there isn’t much around. We’re going up some stairs as an HB9 is coming up. She’s the hottest girl I’ve seen so far so I open her. I go direct by telling her she looks gorgeous, then I ask her name. Turns out she’s here for her 19th birthday party. 10 years younger than me… Anway, the set doesn’t really hook so I let her go.

In the future I’ll open with what Rob Judge uses, “You’re adorable. I wanted to meet you.”. Although what you open with doesn’t really matter, that opener’s clever from a psychological point of view. I’ll right an entire post on it another time explaining why.

Later my wing and I are standing with our backs to the back of a booth in the golden spot. The golden spot is the spot in any bar / club which is equidistant from both the bar an the girl’s toilets. It’s a high traffic spot that’s perfect for grabbing girls on their own or in pairs as they go past.

My wing has a set that almost hooks, but not quite. I explain to him how locking the girl in against the back of the both can help in hooking sets, as it makes the girl feel like she’s having a conversation with you, rather than feeling like she’s just about to walk off.

I open  an English HB8 that’s walking by with something like, “Hey, I need to talk to you right now. It’s really important. You’re cute, what’s your name?”. It hooks moderately well, but I realise I need to lock her in if this is going to go anywhere.

The banter’s going quite well, but my wing keeps interrupting and breaking my flow. He’s trying to get her to hold his glass. He doesn’t seem to realise dominance should come via finesse, not just barking orders at a girl. Eventually the girl makes her excuses and goes back to her friends. I raise the issue of not interrupting when I’m one one one with a girl to my wing. He told me he was trying to help me lock the girl in. He told him thanks, but no help needed. I explain to him about the bubble of love (from RSD’s Tim) which exists around a guy and a girl before a pull, and how having a third person stops that bubble existing.

After some more drinks, we hit the dance floor. The English girl is there and recognizes me. My wing says I should go for it. I disagree. She’s there pulling silly dance moves with a large group of her girlfriends. And that’s what she wants to do at the moment, have fun with her friends. When she’s done that for a while and had a couple more drinks, then she’ll be ready for having fun with men instead of her girls. So much of it is about being in the right place at the right time. In retrospect I would have danced with her for a bit without any escalation, then left her. This would have created a strong possibility of reopening and easily closing later in the night.

So I’m busting my (terrible, frankly) moves on the dance floor. The place is starting to get busy. There are a reasonable number of decent girls on the dance floor at this point. As I’m browsing this vagina buffet for a target I notice HBSexyLilDancer from earlier. She can really move her body. They say that dancing is the first stage in the human mating ritual, where people dance to attract a mate. Watching her dance now this seems very true.

A quick aside on girls dancing sexy. I’ve started to notice that these fall into two categories:

  1. The attention whore
  2. The girl whose DTF

It’s hard to explain how to spot the difference between the two types, it’s just an experience thing. I can tell HBSexyLilDancer falls firmly into the DTF camp. She’s dancing like she’s the only girl in the world and no ones watching. She’s grinding her hips back and forth just for her, because she’s horny and wants to feel the music in her body, not because she wants to put a display on for the chodes.

I realise that my wing has already made his move; he’s kiss closing HBSexyLilDancer’s friend. He introduces me to her. I turn to HBSexyLilDancer.

Me: Is this your friend?

Her: Yes

Me: Cool. What’s you’re name?

Her: HBSexyLilDancer

Me: That accent…. eastern Europe?

Her: Slovakia… I’m from Slovakia. You?

Me: I’m English. I come from near London.

I take both of her hands and make strong eye contact.

Me: How long has the little Slovakian girl been in London?

Her: Two months.

Me: How many English men have you kissed since you’ve been in London?

Her: None. I have never kissed an English man.

Me: No? That’s so sad.

I move my head towards hers.

Me: You really should try it while you’re here.

I don’t even get to finish moving in for the kiss… She quickly and aggressively bridges the rest of the distance herself and we kiss. Her friend runs off and leaves my wing on his own.

We spend 5 minutes going for it on the dance floor. My hands on her tits, her hands on my cock. Girls often seem to put guys they pull on the dance floor into a box labeled, “Random Dance floor Pull”. They never answer when guys in this box call them the next day. They rarely go home with guys in this box. Obviously, you don’t want to be in this box, and this means getting them of the dance floor ASAP.

I grab her hand and start to lead her hand and start to lead her off the dance floor.

Her: Where are we going

Me: Don’t worry, just down stairs to the restaurant. It’s quiet there, and we need to talk.

Her: OK

I lead her to the restaurant where we sit in a booth and talk. Standard rapport building stuff. I have to admit, building comfort is a weak point of mine. This is especially true with non anglosphere girls. This is bad as there is plenty of girls in London who fall into this category. I just find it hard getting either wide or deep rapport with a girl who’s from somewhere like Europe or South America. I think it’s partly a language thing, partly a culture thing.

After I bit of chat we start to make out again. I put her hand on my cock and she rubs it, but stops me putting my hand up her skirt. I ask her to come home with me, she says no, because she’s not that type of girl. She asks me what I think of that type of girl, and I respond truthfully, “I think the decision to go home with a guy on the first night is down to a girl’s views on sex. I don’t think a girl’s view on sex reflects in any way on the rest of her personality, how how quality she is. In other words I don’t, unlike many guys, believe that a girl’s quality is determined by how quickly she jumps into bed with a man”. I don’t have the whole Madonna / Whore issue going on like many (even community) guys do. In retrospect, a better answer would have been, “That’s just what happens in London. People go home together the first night they meet all of the time”.

I put her hand back on my cock as I make out with her passionately. She gets really into it, and gives me a hand job under the table as I suck on her tits. After this I number close her. An important point to note here is that I didn’t ring her number to make sure I’d got it right till later in the night. Turns out I had entered it wrong the first time. Lesson learned: always ring them when you number close them to confirm the number’s been entered correctly. I tell her I’m going to take her for cocktails in Covent Garden.

After we’re done with all that my wing shows up, and we all go to smoke then I get some drinks in. We talk more and look for her friends, but she can’t find them. After a bit more dancing I’m hungry, so we leave the club and go to a Chinese restaurant. I consider bouncing her back to my flat from here, but she’s still worried about finding her friends, and when she tells me her coat is still at the club that idea is ruined.

She calls one of her friends and it turns out she’s gone to the London Eye with some men. This makes no sense, as it’ll obviously be closed at this time, but it’s random and makes me laugh. Her friend says she will get a bus home from there. This is good news for me, but there are still two of her friends left in the club. It would be preferable to me if she didn’t find them, then I can play the whole, “You’ll have to come home with me” card. We go return to the club.

As soon as we get there we hit the dance floor. She starts touching my cock again. I get turned on so drag her to a table where she wanks me off again. Then back on the dance floor for the rest of the night.

The night is drawing to an end at this point, and back in the club her sexual dancing is attracting the desperate men who haven’t managed to pull.  Despite the fact I’m obviously with her a chode crystal forms around us on the dance floor. Guys try to pull her in multiple ways: eye fucking her as she dances, booty bumping her, trying to grind her. When I’m leading her off the dance floor at the end, I feel resistance. I look back and some cheeky fucker who’d been circling us on the dance floor for the last 20 minutes has actually grabbed her hand and is trying to pull her in. Horniness will make guys bold. I tell him promptly to fuck off. He backs off. If she hadn’t of tossed me off twice already which made me more chilled out, I may well have hit the guy at that point.

As the club kicks out she gets a text. Turns out her other two friends have left. “You’ll have to come home with me then. I’m worried about the thought of you getting the bus on your own”. She’s having none of it.

At that point a fight breaks out. Some guy gets knocked out on the street right near the club, his head hitting the ground with a large cracking sound on the way down. This sends the girl into floods of tears as I ring for an ambulance. Am hoping the guys blood comes out of the white shirt I was wearing when I wash it. Certainly a dramatic end to the night.

I ring her the next evening. We arrange to have cocktails in Covent Garden in a couple of days time. She says she may have to cancel due to work. The next day she cancels via text. I ask her when she’s free, and she tells me she’s very busy this week but will let me know. That was a couple of days ago, and I haven’t text back. That last text wasn’t a good sign. The whole, “I’ll let you know when I’m free” line from a girl usually means they don’t want to see you, but that isn’t always the case. I’ll text her on Saturday and try and set something up for next week if she hasn’t contacted me. I’d say it’s 50/50 for the fclose at this point.

Looking back, the only thing I’d do differently is to make more attempts to put my hand up her skirt. I think I only made one. If I could get some fingers inside her, chances are she’d have been coming home with me so I could finish her off.

Stats since 1st September:
1 number closes
3 kiss closes
1 f closes

  1. […] of my regular readers may remember HBSexyLilDancer. She is 21 and I met her in a club back in September. I KClosed her and she gave me a hand shandy. […]

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