Failed to pull the trigger

Posted: March 15, 2012 in Uncategorized
Tags: , ,

Since I’ve got over the worst of my AA and have had some cold approach lays now, the allure of cold approach has dimmed slightly. Now I’m more interested in getting girls the easiest way possible, so I turned back to online dating.

This time around I’ve been pretty successful at getting responses and getting girls out on dates. I’ve send around 30 – 35 opening messages and got about a dozen replies. This is over the course of around 10 days. I’ve had 2 dates so far, one with a HB7 and one last night with an HB8. I have another today with an HB6, a day 2 from cold approach on Monday with an HB7 and maybe another date next week from online with an HB6/7. Due to this success I’ve filtered out a few girls who have been responsive online.

So far, so good. Now we get to the problem.

The HB8 I met last night was just my type physically. Long brown curly hair, piercing eyes and a tight little body. Things seemed to go well. I wasn’t nervous or second guessing myself, and the conversation flowed freely. There’s plenty of light touching between us. We get to the second venue and things get a little flirty, but like a twat I break the sexual tension instead of pushing forward.

She was hot enough that I got a boner just talking to her, but for some reason, despite not receiving any negative signals from her, I failed to escalate to a kiss close. I’m not sure why. If I had met her in a club I’d find it so easy. I escalate quite fast in clubs these days.

I don’t think it was because she was hot. She came across as a little reserved, so I think I fell into the ‘Myth of female purity’ trap that 60 Years of Challenge talks about. This is where you have a really pretty and innocent looking girl, but you don’t escalate because, “She’s just not that type of girl”. In reality the girl probably enjoys a good stuffing by the right man. Nearly all girls do, and I’m not willing to date the few that aren’t.

In the future I’m going to have to push it with the escalation. I’m just going to look into the hotties pretty eyes and imagine her sucking me off and then go for it. I’ll keep pushing and I won’t put by foot on the breaks until she shows me the red light. This is basically a no fail strategy. The only girls that are going to bail on me for escalating but at the same time listening to her feedback if I’m moving too fast are girls who were never going to go for me anyway. I literally have nothing to lose by going for it. I need to really get this into my head, as this is important.

If I don’t get a second date with her I’ll now always be wondering if it’s because I didn’t have the balls to make a move. I don’t like regrets like this. The other day in the club on the dance floor I saw an HB8 with an amazing ass, and by god she knew how to move it. I wasn’t going to approach, because I didn’t think I stood a chance. Most guys there seemed to bottle it when it came to approaching her. It was the way she moved and oozed sexuality. It was intimidating most guys. But in the end I did approach her. I decided I really couldn’t live with not knowing what might happen. I got a polite rejection. It was still better than not knowing.


Stats since 1st March:
8 number closes
3 kiss closes
0 f closes

  1. M says:

    I like your posts and wish you wrote more often. What tips do you have for online dating? Do you pay for a site or are there free ones you rec? I’m going to be moving soon and think it would be great to both hit the streets and use online to supplement a new social life.

    • betatopua says:

      I do want to start a twice a week schedule of posts soon.

      As for dating sites, I never pay for one. There’s no need, plus the cost puts barriers up (like often it’s free to have a profile but you have to pay if you want to respond to messages. This leaves many profiles that you’re messaging which will have to sign up to a paid subscription to message you back).

      I’d recommend Plenty of Fish.

      As far as online dating tips go, I’d want to both refine my process / profile / pics and sleep with some hotter girls I’ve met online first, then I may write an in depth guide or even and EBook.

      • M says:

        I just joined PoF for the hell of it, and have to admit, I am excited at the prospects. I msg girls for a good 2 hours. I think my profile is solid, I have a webcam shot, a gig photo, and one of me with a hot girl.

        I don’t have a good sense of what to send for a first msg.

        I’ve messed around and sent 5 short, 5 nonsense, 5 mid, and detailed.

        What is a good length to get a response? I always qualify in the msg.

      • betatopua says:

        I’m going to do a post now on opening online, that’s one aspect of it I do think I have down.

  2. Jim says:


    There is an excellent guide to online game on the LSS at:

    If you are not already a member sign up so that you can have a read of it.

  3. […] in life too. I’ll be honest, I really want this girl. The first date was quite subdued and I pussied out of going in for the kiss. On the second date I gave myself a pep talk half way through. I confirmed to myself that all the […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s