Hypergamy in action

Posted: September 21, 2012 in Uncategorized

Hypergamy refers to women’s instinct to seek out a mate they believe is above them in the social hierarchy. This is why being the alpha male, or leader of the group is considered so important in the seduction community. If you’re right at the apex of the male social hierarchy, you will be very attractive to women.

I recently got the chance to hear about this in action, and found it very interesting. It’s always insightful when ever a very theoretical part of game manifests itself in a practical and obvious way.

Earlier this week I fclosed a girl (not hot, if I’m honest) that I met at a singles night (I’m starting to think these could be really fruitful when I actually start opening the hotter girls that go there…). On our date we got talking about her life, and it turns out her martial arts club is a big part of it. She joins in with all the social events, so the club is her core social group. The club is part of a large London wide association, so members have the opportunity to meet lots of people.

The conversation soon comes around to fucking that goes on within the club / association. Turns out its so common that there’s actually a competition (not official, of course!) complete with a point scoring system.  Basically, the higher the belt / grade of the person you have sex with, the higher the points.

She went on to tell me that most girls have a much higher score based on this system than the men. I asked her why this was. Firstly, there are more men than girls. This means the points are spread more thinly for the men. Secondly, she told me girl’s wouldn’t like to have sex with a guy who was a lower grade than them, meaning that for every hookup the guy would generally get less points out of it than the girl.

This is the interesting thing. The women weren’t choosing their sexual partners in order to maximise points for the competition, it just wasn’t that serious. Yet they would only fuck upwards in terms of grades, never down. I asked her if she would ever fuck a guy of a lower grade, if he was hot. She said no. I asked her to explain this. I told her it made little sense. After all, if I joined tomorrow I’d be a white belt, right at the bottom of the pile. Does that suddenly make me unfuckable?

She couldn’t really explain this. Thinking about it gave her a slightly puzzled look on her face. It’s like when Heartiste talks about the rationalisation hampster within a girls head. Each time she has to try and explain a decision that was made by the primitive animal part of her brain (the hindbrain) logically, the hampster spins in its wheel, trying to come up with a logical rationalisation to explain her choices. The hampster was spinning hard for this girl.

She just ended up saying the lower belts weren’t good enough for her. They were beneath her. Being part of a large association, I doubt this can be true. She isn’t hot, and so there must be many guys of lower grades that have a higher sexual market value than her when evaluated outside the context of the organisation.

I think the dynamics of a martial arts club roughly mirror a tribe back in caveman days. A large club would be roughly the same size as a tribe. The higher the belt you are the more people you teach, which mean more people defer to you. Given what we know of game its no surprise that girls are ‘mysteriously’ attracted to guys if higher grades than themselves.

  1. GunsofApollo says:

    One thing have not been able to fully pin down is the illusion of social status or power. What I mean by that is that I am a leader by nature, loud, fun, charismatic – BUT – compared to let’s say some of the model girls I have dated I feel I am lacking in that social power boost when girl’s hamsters freak out over trivial status details – real or fictional. Things men value in status just don’t always transfer.

  2. Jim Bacon says:

    I think an interesting point you can take from your above real life example is that you should pick your fights.

    If getting near the top of any organisation involving decent numbers of women brings you success with them, then you should carefully pick where you put your free time.

    I experienced probably the ultimate example of this when I was a bar rep in a tourist resort for a short while. Even though my self confidence could not have been any lower I still got laid from the job. All because we were shitty reps at some shitty bar.

    But if there are bargains out there in terms of effort and requirements vs results, why argue with them?

  3. dumasworld says:

    ‘entourage game’ works on this concept. Though I think it’s a real shitty way to go to it. The best way is to have a solid group of friends (a pack) who rotate the alpha lead depending on the situation. For example if my group of friends are having drinks at a bar and a girl of mine texts me and asks if she can come out and she turns up, then my friends will all submit power to me and DHV me, i’ll make the decisions for the night.

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