Posts Tagged ‘field report’

When I arrived at my second ever singles night I simply wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone. As a very introverted person I get this way sometimes. It also didn’t help that I’d only had 3 hours sleep the night before, and my wing wasn’t going to get there for 30 minutes.

Some girls tried to talk to me as I arrived but I basically brushed them off. I went to the bar and ordered a beer, and just stood there alone and silent as I waited for my wing to arrive. At this point I didn’t see the night going well for me. I surveyed the room. Maybe 50 women. I’d say 30 were nos for me, a few that were pretty hot, and the rest were passable. Not a great line up.

Things get better after my wing arrives. We chat for a while and talk to some girls (who neither of us are sexually interested in) who we met at the last singles event. By that point I’m starting my second beer and I’m pretty warmed up. We go on the prowl around the venue. I open a younish Russian girl, HB6. We chat for a while but she doesn’t get my sense of humour (people who don’t speak English extremely well often don’t) and her conversational skills are poor. She excuses herself and goes back to her friends. Good. Do not want.

I keep making eyes at a very exotic looking HB8, one of the few hot girls in the room. She returns the eye contact and smiles, but she’s sat in a booth so it’s too physically hard to get to her to open.

A bit later on my wing is in set with the one girl in the venue he really likes (he’s picky) so I go on the prowl on my own. An HB5 with a slightly cockney accent opens me by saying hello as I walk by. She’s got a nice body on her but the face isn’t great at all. I say hi back and keep on walking. It isn’t actually till I’m a few feet away that I realize she was trying to open me. It was just so quick as I was walking by that it caught me by surprise.

I walk over to some nearby steps to have a think. Is she hot enough for me? Will it look silly if I reapproach (no)? Then she makes the decision for me by coming over to me and talking to me. Turns out she’s a Software Developer like me. I play dumb and pretend I know nothing about software development. Then I tell her I’m actually a programmer. She doesn’t believe me so I pretend I’m pretending to be a software developer by making up fake but plausible sounding programming languages and saying I programme in them. I sit her down on a sofa and kiss  and number close her after chatting for a while.

After around 30 minutes I decide the number’s solid, so I want to leave her and go on the prowl again. I’ve caught the eye of the exotic HB8 a number of times and so I want to open her. My girl goes to get a drink while I go for a smoke. On my way back a very solid HB7 blonde opens me by saying hello as I walk by. Again, I just say hi back not realising that she wanted to chat me up until I was already walking away. I’m not that used to women opening me, so I’m always caught by surprise when they do, so I fuck it up like this. I’m just about to walk back to her when my girl comes back up to me. It turns out her friends have now left so she sticks to me like glue for the rest of the night, holding on to my arm any time I walk around the venue. This means I never open anyone else. I would have felt bad telling her I wanted to meet other people, especially since all of her friends have now left. I never got the chance to have a go at any of the hotter girls in the bar.

My wing flat out berated me for this the next time I saw him. He told be I’m really to good for girls like that and I need to either flat out reject them, or if I do decide to number close them, at least be firm about moving on once I’m sure the number is solid. He’s right. I’m not used to rejecting girls. To be honest I’ll sleep with a girl who isn’t great looking as long as they make it easy for me (ie approaching me or giving me huge approach invitations) and they’re attractive enough to give me a boner. My time in field is limited, so I have to get used to focusing on the hotter girls. It’s time to level up. I shouldn’t go for anything less than a really solid 7, and should be approaching many HB8s and HB9s (9s are very rare, though). In the context of singles nights this means approaching only the top 5-10% of women there.

As I’m stood outside the bar at the end of the night trying to work out how to get home, and HB6/7 blonde approaches me and goes direct on me, telling me she’d seem be inside but at the time wasn’t brave enough to approach me. I can’t believe a girl would  be too nervous to approach me. This really puts AA in perspective to me. Some girls must find it crazy that guys are too shy to approach them, thinking, “I’m not scary, why would a man be scared of approaching me? I don’t get to chat to her for long because her (really drunk and annoying) friends are trying to drag her off into the taxi. I do a really quick number close. I don’t often do this (because I think in a set you should be aiming for a certain vibe, not aiming to get a girls number), but given the situation it’s my only option.

After two singles nights I’ve gathered all the information I need about the ‘structure’ / social dynamics of the events:

  1. Things get going really early and wind down early. This is because the events are on a week night. Things are in full swing by 7pm, and wind down just before 11.
  2. Girls will approach me, but many of them won’t be hot enough for me.
  3. It’s easy to open and you don’t really get blown out harshly because it’s singles night. It’s what people are there for so there’s no social awkwardness with opening a set. it’s all semi warm approach. This means that all the chodes open. Unfortunately, that means that all the hottest girls are in set almost the entire night.

From this I have devised a strategy:

  1. On arriving at the venue do a circuit and talent spot the hottest girls. These will be my only targets.
  2. Very soon after this open a warm up set so I can get socially lubricated.
  3. If girls open me and take me by surprise, just go back to them and say, “Sorry you were trying to talk to me but I was a million miles away. My name’s BetaToPua…”.
  4. If girls who aren’t hot enough open me, chat to them cordially for a few minutes, but then make my excuses and end the conversation. I must get used to rejecting girls. These events only happen twice a month for a few hours at a time. No time to waste.
  5. If one of my targets seems to always be speaking to guys, I have two options. I can open an adjacent set so I can keep an eye on her, then pounce on her when she’s free. Alternatively, I can open her friends and use them to get introduced to her. That then forms one big set of me, her friends, her and they guy who’s opened her. From there I can gauge her interest in me, and if it’s strong enough isolate her to a nearby sofa and leave the guy chatting to her friends. A slightly Mystery Method approach, but I think it’s the best option. It will also help me gain more advanced social skills, as doing something like this regularly is not something most guys can do.
  6. I should remember that at these events girls really do come there to meet guys who are just like me. I’m one of the more desirable men there. I need to realise this and set my standards accordingly (ie only going after the top 5-10% of girls in the bar).
  7. I should be getting 2-3 numbers a night from HB7s/HB8s.

The next event is on the 22nd August in Shoreditch. If any readers want to join me there that would be great, I’m currently looking to expand my wing / friendship circle. Email me on betatopua at googlemail dot com.

One of my occasional wings has been on at me for a while about going to a singles night run by a London centric dating website. He claimed to me that it’s really easy to get girls there. Since all the girls at the event are “Single and ready to mingle” this makes sense. The events happen twice a month. They’re held on weeknights in central London bars, and are free to attend. There’s no special activities organized at the event, so it’s just like a normal night at a bar, expect pretty much everyone there is available and looking to meet someone.

I went along to one this Thursday after work. After meeting my wing (and spotting some other London ‘lair’ guys I recognize) I started to take in the vibe of the place and started checking out the women that were on offer. Since I’m used to night clubs, the vibe was much more subdued than I’m used to. Quieter music and no dancing (early in the night). I felt out of my element right off the bat. I knew the environment meant that I’d have to do a lot more talking, particularly as part of a group. As huge introvert, this is most definitely my weak point. I stayed positive and thought that this would simply give me a chance to to work on this weak point. The percentage of girls who are hot is lower than in a normal club, mainly due to the older crowd (25 – 35 I’d say).

I’m stood drinking beer and talking to my wing when I notice a group of three girls across the bar. One of them is scanning the room, a sure sign she wants to be picked up. I lock eyes with her. She smiles briefly before looking away. Two minutes later that same group of three girls is no longer across the bar. They’re stood right behind us. Hmm. What could be going on here. I point this out to my wing. An older guy (late 40s) who my wing introduced me to earlier (turns out this guy is an older PUA) opens them. A few minutes later he brings my wing into the set then ejects himself. My wing then brings me into the set.

I think it was something to do with not being warmed up, but I felt slightly uncomfortable right away. This doesn’t usually happen to me these days. I soon get over it and make conversation. My wings talking to the HB7/8 (lets call her HBLovestruck) who made eye contact with me, there’s an HB8 who seems too sarcastic for my liking and an HB6 who seems friendly. I chat to the HB6. Just general chat, nothing special. My wing disappears and another guy opens HBLovestruck. After he gives up she says hello to me. I tell her I’ve forgotten her name. She tells me in a flirty way that that’s very rude. I tell her I’m a rude person. We exchange names and chat. It turn’s out that she’s a member of the dating website so I tease her about being on a dating website (I elected not to mention I’m on a dating website too). I finish my beer and so I eject to buy another.

Over the next couple of hour I don’t actually open any sets. Since it’s a singles night, unlike in most bars / clubs average guys here are approaching women. I just hate doing approaches on a group of girls that look closed off. I keep getting brought into set with my wing. I don’t like most of the girls I am talking too, they are boring. There’s one two set where one of the girls is very flirty and makes good conversation. My wing number closes her then ejects. I stay and chat a while. I do like the girl. She’s a solid 7 with a great personality, but since my wing took her number I keep things platonic then eject.

It’s about 9:30 and I haven’t opened a set of my own yet. I need to get in more practice approaching groups in this environment. My wings one on one with a great girl. I chat to her for a bit and she’s cool. She tells me I’m one of the top 5 guys in the room, but I clearly know it from the way I walk around the place, so some girls may be put off by my arrogant vibe. A fair assessment.

I go on the prowl then see exactly the type of girl I’m looking for. Her two friends are chatting to a guy, and she’s stood a little away from them half dancing to the music and not joining in with their conversation. This is a DTF signal. I approach her.

I tell her I like the way she’s dancing when no one else is, I think she has a good vibe about her. We talk about the dating event and her being single. I tell her how I find it hard to find girls who I really click with, and I can tell early on if we’ll  get on. I tell her I’m yet to meet anyone I’m interested in tonight, and I won’t just hang in there chatting to a hot girl if I don’t find them interesting. I say that I’m quite to the point so if I’m still chatting to a girl after 10 minutes that means I like her, otherwise I’ll move on before that. She asks how long we’ve been chatting for and I tell her 9 minutes. It’s at this point I decide to isolate her.

I’ve noticed how most guys (both PUAs and ‘chodes’) just stay in the same spot they met a girl talking and talking and talking, either hoping something will happen or waiting till enough time has passed to take the girls number. In my opinion, this is were most newbie PUAs (who have overcome AA) go wrong with night game. After 10 / 15 minutes of chatting with a girl in the same spot you met her things start to go stale. You need to escalate and that’s what most guys fail to do.

When I say escalate, I don’t necessarily mean physically. What I take escalation to mean is escalating the level of intimacy between you and the girl in such away that it moves the interaction closer to sex. Physical escalation is just one way of doing this. Other ways include:

  • Verbally sexually escalating
  • Verbally escalating by putting a romantic spin on the conversation (ask them if they’re single, for example)
  • Isolating the girl

I always like to isolate the girl as quickly as possible. often within 5 minutes. Isolation gives you both the sense that you’re together now, and it’s a strong feeling. She’ll also be more likely to allow physical escalation when you’re one on one.

So I take this girl to a sofa. We chat to for a bit, just standard ABC getting to know you stuff. I tell her I only just noticed how nice her legs are and kiss close her. A few minutes later I’ve got my hand up her skirt with my fingers inside her panties rubbing her clit. I try and take her home but she won’t come with me, so I take her number and tell her we’ll do drinks soon. We chat for a few minutes longer then I take her back to her friends.

About this time I get another approach invitation from HBLovestruck. It was the third she’s given me tonight. I didn’t take it because I felt the girl I just fingered was a good sex prospect and I didn’t want to mess it up. I though about this later though and I realized I fucked this night up. It should have been HBLovestruck I was on the sofa with, not the other girl. I really need to start going after the hotter women.

I hate drunk girls

Posted: June 17, 2012 in Uncategorized
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This is a field report from last Saturday night.

I’m at my favorite club with my wings. It’s early in the night and I’m in a bad mood because two girls (HBBrightEyes, one of my regular girls and the cute young Swedish girl who I’m yet to fuck) have both flaked on my via text for dates over the coming few days. I’m dancing on the dancefloor, but because my heart isn’t really in it and my mind is a million miles away my dancing is really half arsed.

I notice an HB8 platinum blonde is standing a few feet in front of me copying my dance moves and laughing at me. I walk up to her, “Are you mocking my dancing?”. We talk for a little and it turns out she’s Irish and lives her in London. We’ll call her HBPlatinum. Good potential logistics, so many girls in central London clubs don’t live in London. She’s very touchy feely with me early on which is good. She’s at the club with one friend, another blonde Irish girl who seems drunk. Her friend has a bad attitude so I ignore her, and go back to talking to HBPlatinum. I tell her that her friend seems really drunk and really pissed off. Her friend wants to go to a different part of the club. HBPlatinum wants to stay and talk to me, but her friend literally drags her off.

I go to another dance floor and hit on another girl but she isn’t interested.

After a little bit of a wander and chatting to my wings a bit, I see a girl on the dance floor. Her face isn’t pretty but her body is quite nice. I also like the way she’s shaking her ass. I think she knows I’ve noticed her, and my spider sense tells me that she may well be interested in me. I stand there watching and I really can’t decide if I want her or not. Loving the shaking ass, not liking the face. The club’s not that busy and there isn’t much else around so I think I’m going to go for her.

Just then her and her friend leave to go to a different part of the club. I follow them upstairs onto a different dance floor. It’s more crowded there. Just as I’m looking for them I notice HBPlatinum and we start chatting. She’s lost her bitchy friend. Good. She seems interested in me but it seems more friendly than full on sexual, which is no good. She tells me I’m chewing my gum too much and mimics me. Irish girls are good at making fun of people, I notice. “Yeah.”, I say. And carry on chewing the same. She tells me she doesn’t like it. “Tell you what. I’ll do you a deal. If you kiss me, I’ll get rid of the gum”. She gives me a kiss on the lips. “No. That’s no good. A proper kiss”. She tongues me down. Kiss close.

I make good on my deal and get rid of the gum. “Shall we get drinks?”, she asks. “You offering to buy me a drink?” I reply. She says she is so we go to the bar and she gets the round in. I take us to the restaurant where it’s quiet and we talk about our lives and makeout a little more. She doesn’t seem too into the making out and seems to put the breaks on a lot. She also tells me she’s single at the moment and only sleeps with guys in LTRs. I ask for her number and tell her I’ll take her for cocktails in Covent Garden. “I’ve already been to Covent Garden” she says. Cheeky girl. “Yeah, so? You’ll go again, this time with me”. She agrees and gives me her number.

At this point I’m faced with a decision. Stay with HBPlatinum or resume the hunt.

It’s still not that late. Probably not even midnight yet (club closes at 3pm). The club has filled up since I’ve been with her. There are lots more girls around. I’ve seen some hotties, plus some girls giving of DTF signals and others giving me subtle approach invites. Given HBPlatinum’s lack of enthusiasm at making out and the fact she says she only likes sex in LTRs (though this could be bullshit) mean that going back on the hunt for another girl then calling HBPlatinum the next day to set up a day2 is the best option. Despite this for some reason I decide to stick with her. It’s probably the combination of her being hot, me having invested 40+ minutes in her already and the fact that I can’t be bothered to go hunting again. I make the (bad) decision to stay.

I spend the next hour with her. She never really lets the escalation get too far, although she is OK with me squeezing her tits at one point. I ask her to come home with me and she says she’s not that type of girl. I tell her people should just do what makes them happy. Every now and again she runs into some guys she’s spoken to earlier in the night and chats with them. They try and kiss her etc but she’s having none of it. Each time this happens I just wander off and drink / dance on my own and she comes and finds me. I really should have ditched her.

Eventually just after 1pm she agrees to come home with me and we leave the club and get into a cab.

On the 20 minute ride back to mine it becomes obvious that the alcohol (we’d had a few rounds together at the club, doubles) had really started to hit her. Outside of the loud club it becomes more apparent just how wasted she is. She’s not making much sense in what she says. This wasn’t so obvious in the club due her strong Irish accent coupled with the loud music. I realize that she’s too wasted to fuck.

We arrive at my flat and she just keeps saying she doesn’t like the place and prefers her flat. She’s quite cold towards me and is pissing me off. She says she wants to sleep. I decide having her sleep here could mean she wakes up in the morning not remembering where she is or what happened the night before and freaking out. I don’t like the thought of that, so I ask her where she lives and if she has money for a cab. She does, so I call a cab. Fifteen minutes later the cab comes and I put her in it. I won’t be calling her.

Friday night field report

Posted: June 5, 2012 in Uncategorized
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I went to my favourite central London club on Friday night. It wasn’t very busy (maybe half full) due to it being a bank holiday weekend. I think I actually prefer it when it’s not too full. Less women yes, but more space to move. I may start to make Friday nights (which aren’t as busy as Saturdays in London) my main night out.

Myself and two wings arrived early as per usual, and by 9pm we were stood at the main bar dancing the dance floor, chatting and drinking.  We’re studying the almost empty dance floor and summing up the girls. There are 3 eastern European looking girls who seem quite drunk, dancing over the top sexy on the dance floor, and they seem to be having a great time doing it. They aren’t great looking though. One of them’s a 7 the other two at best 6s. They can move fairly well though. I’m thinking they’re more drunk / attention whoring rather than DTF. The only other set of interest is a 3 set, all asian girls, standing around a table on the edge of the dance floor. Two of them are ugly and look bored. The third is hot. I don’t usually like asians but this girl had quite a voluptuous figure on her, and I’d rate her as an 8. The hottie, unlike her friends is dancing sexy all around the table and having a great time. I judge that the hottie is DTF and so has dragged her reluctant friends to a club. My wings concur with my assesment.

My wings go out to smoke, and I stay to finish my pint. My third wing arrives, and after a brief chat he goes to find the other two. After I’m done drinking, I decide to move closer to the sets and see what reaction I get. I move to the edge of the dance floor and watch. The HBAsian notices me watching but won’t give me eye contact. She’s a bit tall for me and I’m 50/50 about moving in on her or the Eastern Europeans. She looks hotter but they look easier. It’s often the way…

My decision is made fore me as one of the HB6 eastern European’s catches my gaze and dances over to me. I stand there smiling as she rubs herself against me. I chat to her a little. She dances I just stand there. I’m trying to decide whether she’s attractive enough to put in any effort. I dance with her a little and remain unsure. After sandwich dancing with her and her hotter friend she moves back to her group. Despite not being hot these girls are getting a lot of male attention due to the way they’re dancing. I think they’re just attention whoring, looking for ego boosts. I go and find my wings.

At another part of the bar I’m with all three of my wings getting drinks. We’re shouting ‘Woooo’ loudly to make fun of one of our wings who’s into RSD after going to their London hotseat event (‘Wooo’ is a reference to the Flawless Natural). This catches the attention of an HB8 blonde with a nice ass who’s been stood at the bar with her back to us. She turns around to see what the noise is. I use the opportunity to open. I say hi to her and we start to talk. Turns out she’s English (fairly rare in central London clubs), and lives near London in roughly the same area I grew up in. We talk for a while, it’s all friendly and I’m much less physical than I probably should have been. I take things too slowly early in the night. She says good bye and goes back to her friends. I feel she has potential later in the night. I decide to keep my eye open for her. We’ll call her HBSurrey.

I go back to the eastern Europeans who are still dancing away. I decide they’re too wasted and attention whorish so I give up on that set. I walk across the dance floor and there’s a two set standing at a table. One of them is stood drinking, the other dancing away in a flowing white dress. She’s a blonde HB8. There’s just something about the way she’s positioned herself  that makes me think she wants male attention. As I’m walking past I grab her hand and spin her around and start dancing with her. Brief conversation interspersed with the  dancing lets me find out she’s Danish, but lives in London. She won’t let me get too close to her as we dance. I keep pulling back a little, then waiting, then trying to get closer again. Two steps forward one step back escalation. I manage to get quite close to her, and gently caress the top half of her as as she stands side on to me pressed up against me. Her ass feels epic. Pert without being small. She backs off after I do this and thanks me for the dance. I tell her I’m going to come back and see her later (after she’s had another drink or two haha).

I catch up with my wings for a bit, then go on the prowl around the club. I see a short HB7 dancing and go say hello to her. We chat for a while. She can dance really well, and has a fun personality but tells me she has a bf. We chat for a bit more and I move on.

I bump into another wing, and as we’re going down the main stairs in the club I spot a red head HB7 I’m sure I’ve seen out and about in another central club. When she reaches the ground level she starts dancing on her own at the edge of the dance floor. I spin her around gently and say hi. I start dancing with her. Turns out she’s Polish and living in London. She’s at the club on her own which is a good sign. I do the whole two steps forward one back escalation thing, backing off each time I encounter resistance. I maintain strong sexualized eye contact the whole time.

After about 10 minutes I kiss close her. Here’s where I think I make a mistake. The first kiss is really long, and I kiss her too much. I’m thinking maybe in situations like this it’s best to not do too much kissing, and really work the sexual tension. She doesn’t want to come and have a drink with me, but will come with me to a different part of the club. She only really seems interested in dancing. Our grinding and kissing becomes more intense. I’m groping her as and basically dry humping her pussy. I spin her around and she grabs hold of a bar as she grinds me with her ass. I rub her pussy hard through her jeans. I figure she must be quite horny by now and go for the extraction. I tell her we should go somewhere else. She thinks about it and asks where. I tell her there are plenty of good places, lets go. She says no. She goes cold on me after that. She won’t kiss me anymore, and I feel like I’m chasing her across the dance floor. I decide to leave her to it and come to her later. I notice HBSurrey has noticed me grinding with this girl. As such I decided to to reopen her right at this moment, as it might look bad.

I get a text saying my wings are moving on to another club. I decide to stay. I have a bit of a dance with an HB8 with a fantastic ass, but she’s just after male attention, not sex, so I move on quickly.

I’m horny from grinding the Polish girl for the best part of an hour, so I’m prowling the club for a girl who looks DTF. There’s a Brazilian looking girl whose standing a bit away from her friends who are at the bar. She’s bopping to the music. The fact she’s standing apart from them makes me think she wants to be opened. I walk up to her, “Hey, how’s it going”. She gives me a “No way” look and walks off.

I make my way to the dance floor and run into the Polish girl. I dance with her, but she won’t let me escalate. I also see HBSurrey there. Just as I’m deciding whether or not to give up on the Polish girl and move on to her, a guy opens her and gets the kiss close. In retrospect I think I should have been more decisive and decided the Polish set was a dead end and moved on to HBSurrey.

Moving across the dance floor a notice a doe eyed HB7. She looks quite young (not jailbait young though) and has a cute innocent thing going on. I’ve seen her a couple of times already throughout the night, but she’d never return my eye contact, but I know she was aware of me looking at her. I think she must be shy. I move in and say hello. We dance for a while and she seems fairly receptive physically. She’s with a small group of friends so I decide to isolate. I take her to the seating area where it’s quite so we can talk.

We chat and it turns out she’s 21 and just arrived in London from Sweden to live her for 8 months. We chat for 10 minutes and I tell her she’s very pretty, then I kiss close her. Turns out she doesn’t live that far away from me, so I number close her, telling her I’ll show her the best parts of London. I escalate. Turns out she has a nice ass and bigish boobies. I put my hand up her skirt and rub her pussy a little but she stops me. She won’t let me undo my belt and trousers, but she starts giving me a hand job through my jeans after I put her hand on my cock. Just as I’m thinking that this won’t take long with all the grinding on girls I’ve been doing tonight, her fucking friends show up. I’m all like, “Oh, hi! How lovely to meet you…”. They realise we need alone time and quickly fuck off. I like her friends.

I thought she’d freak at this point. She’s obviously not drunk and just got ‘caught’ by her friends (although she hasn’t known these girls all that long), but she doesn’t No ASD kicks in and she finishes me off. We chat some more then go get a drink and chat to her friends. She wants to be alone with me some more so we go and sit down again. At this point she’s just staring into my eyes and saying, “That’s cool” to pretty much everything I say. I think she’s mainly interested in the sexual stuff. I can understand that, I am very handsome.

She won’t come home with me when I ask her. It’s about 90 minutes till the club closes and I’m really tired. I do contemplate staying with her and seeing if she’ll change her mind. I decide not to as I can see all the energy going out of the set due to me being so tired. I leave her saying, “See you soon”. “Possibly” she replies. I laugh, say, “We’ll have to see” and kiss her then leave. I think I should have stayed.

My follow up with her has been too slack. I forgot about her on Saturday. I spent all of Sunday with a girl, and so only managed to message her twice. She did reply to both texts promptly. Tonight (Monday) I messaged her asking what days she’s free to meet this week. This is something I’d prefer to do over the phone, but it was late by the time I remembered to contact her. She hasn’t text back tonight, but it was quite late I texted her, so I’ll see if she texts back tomorrow. If not I’ll ring her early evening. I am a bit disappointed with myself for not moving much faster on the follow up. If I rang her on the saturday I could have set up a date for the Tuesday and have fucked her then.

Showing too little interest can be as bad as showing too much interest. I’ll prioritise contacting girls I’ve number closed in the future.

Friday night

Posted: April 7, 2012 in Uncategorized
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I hadn’t been out sarging or seen my wings for weeks, so I told myself that on Friday (last night as I write this), that come hell or high water, I’d be hitting the club. It seems I spoke too soon…

On Wednesday, HBBrightEyes cancels our Saturday afternoon date, saying she’s decided to go home for the Easter weekend. I reply, no problem, let me know when you’re free. Then on Thursday night she texts me asking if I want to get together on Friday night. My immediate thought was that this was great, as it was the first time she’d been the one to pro-actively move things along.  Then I remembered my vow to go out on Friday and was faced with a tough choice.

On the one hand, so far due to the fact she’s always busy, meeting HBBright eyes has always been on her terms, which is partly due to her circumstances, but it irks me a little. So I didn’t like the idea of saying yes to a Friday night date at the last minute. It was pushing it a little. Also, I really did vow to myself to go out that night. I have flaked on my wings a couple of times in the past few weeks, and didn’t want to do so again. If it was the first time in a while I’d flaked on them I’m sure it’d be OK, but to do so again would be taking the piss. On the other hand, if I did not see her now, it would likely end up being three weeks between our second date and an opportunity for a third date. Things could easily fizzle out. Seeing as we don’t often get the chance to see each other, I should probably make some effort to see her, or she’d lose interest.

My gut reaction was to post on Seddit or the LSS asking what I should do. Last year, that’s what I would have done. Thinking about it, I realized that that was the move a frightend boy would make. A man would know this was his decision to make, and there would be no point in trying to delegate the decision to others. I think the fact that I realised this so quickly is an important milestone on the way to me being the man  want to be.

In the end I made the decision not to see her. In retrospect, seeing as I’m going out with my wings again tonight I could have seen her Friday and them Saturday (although I didn’t know this at the time). I’m really not sure whether or not this was a mistake, but I made my decision. I texted her telling her I was busy, and asking when she’d be back from her trip. 48 hours later and I still have no answer to my text.

Before going out on Friday I was worried that since I’d been away from sarging for so long my AA would be huge. It didn’t help that due to so many people going away for Easter weekend the club was dead and there were few women to chose from. I needn’t have worried though.

Early in the night I’m coming out of the toilets when I spot a HB7.5 with the biggest tits I’ve seen in a while on a girl who wasn’t fat. She’s dancing with her friend, but there’s quite a bit of a gap between them. I walk right up to her, into her personal space and start dancing with her. I was eye fucking her from the off, and she’s doing the same back to me. We’re grinding and I spin her round so she can ass grind me. I spin her back and start thinking about sending the sexual tension through the roof with some push-pull escalation then going for the kiss close. If that works I can try and bounce to a different part of the club, sit her down and build comfort.

So everything’s going great so far. A perfect response from her. But then something comes over me, and I get a little too in touch with my sexual side…

It wasn’t my fault. It was her tits that did it. You could have rested a pint glass on the fuckers. I knew it was way to early (we’re about 60 seconds into the set at this point), but I just had to get my hands on them. So I spin her around and give them a squeeze. She instantly pushes me away and storms off. I work off smirking like a school boy.

I open a couple more sets, but they aren’t receptive. There’s very few targets in the club, but then HBNorthen texts me. It’s a booty call. We agree to meet in 40 minutes time, so I have to leave soon. I do see one more set I want to open, but I’m put off by the fact I have to leave soon and bottle it. Still, I’m opening at least 70% of the sets I want to these days, that is a massive improvement since the beginning of the year when it was maybe 20%.

I leave with no closes and go and fuck HBNorthen. In the ass.

———————————————

Stats since 1st April:
1 number closes
1 kiss closes
0 f closes

Since I’ve got over the worst of my AA and have had some cold approach lays now, the allure of cold approach has dimmed slightly. Now I’m more interested in getting girls the easiest way possible, so I turned back to online dating.

This time around I’ve been pretty successful at getting responses and getting girls out on dates. I’ve send around 30 – 35 opening messages and got about a dozen replies. This is over the course of around 10 days. I’ve had 2 dates so far, one with a HB7 and one last night with an HB8. I have another today with an HB6, a day 2 from cold approach on Monday with an HB7 and maybe another date next week from online with an HB6/7. Due to this success I’ve filtered out a few girls who have been responsive online.

So far, so good. Now we get to the problem.

The HB8 I met last night was just my type physically. Long brown curly hair, piercing eyes and a tight little body. Things seemed to go well. I wasn’t nervous or second guessing myself, and the conversation flowed freely. There’s plenty of light touching between us. We get to the second venue and things get a little flirty, but like a twat I break the sexual tension instead of pushing forward.

She was hot enough that I got a boner just talking to her, but for some reason, despite not receiving any negative signals from her, I failed to escalate to a kiss close. I’m not sure why. If I had met her in a club I’d find it so easy. I escalate quite fast in clubs these days.

I don’t think it was because she was hot. She came across as a little reserved, so I think I fell into the ‘Myth of female purity’ trap that 60 Years of Challenge talks about. This is where you have a really pretty and innocent looking girl, but you don’t escalate because, “She’s just not that type of girl”. In reality the girl probably enjoys a good stuffing by the right man. Nearly all girls do, and I’m not willing to date the few that aren’t.

In the future I’m going to have to push it with the escalation. I’m just going to look into the hotties pretty eyes and imagine her sucking me off and then go for it. I’ll keep pushing and I won’t put by foot on the breaks until she shows me the red light. This is basically a no fail strategy. The only girls that are going to bail on me for escalating but at the same time listening to her feedback if I’m moving too fast are girls who were never going to go for me anyway. I literally have nothing to lose by going for it. I need to really get this into my head, as this is important.

If I don’t get a second date with her I’ll now always be wondering if it’s because I didn’t have the balls to make a move. I don’t like regrets like this. The other day in the club on the dance floor I saw an HB8 with an amazing ass, and by god she knew how to move it. I wasn’t going to approach, because I didn’t think I stood a chance. Most guys there seemed to bottle it when it came to approaching her. It was the way she moved and oozed sexuality. It was intimidating most guys. But in the end I did approach her. I decided I really couldn’t live with not knowing what might happen. I got a polite rejection. It was still better than not knowing.

———————————————

Stats since 1st March:
8 number closes
3 kiss closes
0 f closes

Cost of a hooker in Soho, London: £30 (So I’m told…).

It’s a Friday night and the sky looks miserable, but it’s hot. Like tropical hot. The air is thick with water vapor, hinting at a future downpour and makes doing anything physical seem like a big effort. Given this I’m not surprised the bar is dead. I’m just polishing of my first beer.

Beer: £3.70, Total: £3.70

Me and a couple of wings are hitting on girls in a quiet corridor that connects two parts of the bar to one another. The responses are luke warm. We could probably do something with this but the heat and the fact the venue is so dead just seems to be making us lethargic. I’m about to call it an early night when one of my wings suggests a bounce to a club. I don’t like the idea because I’ll have to pay the cover, but I agree to go along just to have a look through the window.

Arriving at the club and looking through the window it isn’t very busy. Probably less than 50% capacity. Despite this, the hotties I see through the window in their short skirts shaking their asses convince me to part with the £10 for the cover charge. I head inside with my two wings.

Cover charge: £10, Total: £13.70

The club’s owners appear not to have heard of air conditioning. It’s sweltering and the dance floors all stink of sweat. I get myself a bottle of beer.

Beer: £4.70, Total: £18.40

I chill out for a bit. I’m really not in the mood tonight. I can’t bring myself to open a single set. I see a girl on the edge of the dance floor dancing and grinding her hips. She looks like an HB6. We’ll call her HBGlasses. The way she moves her body attracts me. I’d like to fuck her, but I’m not sure if the dancing is a DTF indicator or attention whoring.

It’s not quite AA, but I can’t bring myself to approach. This is what I’m like in clubs recently. I don’t have a hardcore fear of approaching, it’s more like an apathy. I almost can’t be bothered to approach. There’s still some anxiety,. it’s just not the full on, stomach churning fear it used to be.

Some time passes. I try hitting on a few girls by standing between the bar and the girls’ toilets and poking or grabbing them as they go by. I try about 3/4 girls but nothing hooks well. More time passes and I find myself on a half empty dance floor. I notice HBGlasses out of the corner of my eye. I make eye contact and smile. She smiles back. It’s on.

“Hello”, I say as I approach. She says hi back, her American accent obvious over the loud music. “Buy me a drink and I’ll dance with you!”, she offers. I laugh, “Dance with me an I’ll buy you a drink”. We dance for a couple of minutes, during which time she refuses the k-close, then she asks me to get her a drink again. I decide she’s only after a free drink and this is going nowhere. I tell her no, and walk away. She comes over to me, “Well I’m going to get a drink, do you want to come with me?”. Now I’m curious as to where this might lead. I agree and take her by the hand and lead her to the bar.

The bar is rammed. Looks like a 15 minute wait for drinks. We chit chat about the differences between clubs in the UK and US for a minute, then I decide we’ll get served quicker at the other bar. I grab her hand and lead her there. She’s a bit drunk and not quite sure where I’m taking her. I tell her it’s OK and she seems happy for me to take the lead.

We bump into one of her friends on our way downstairs. I explain where I’m taking her, and her friend goes upstairs to be with her other friends.

The bar queue downstairs is much shorter, as I knew it would be at this time. She grinds against me as we wait to be served. She orders her drink then asks me what I want. I go for a Jack and Coke. She is sort of making out at this stage that she is going to buy the drinks. Score. My cocks really throbbing by now, this girl can move her ass. American girls can grind much better than other girls. God bless America.

Then the barmaid tells us the cost of the drinks. HBGlasses motions that I’m paying. Cheeky bitch I think. “Cheeky bitch”, I say. “You’ve got the dick, you pay the bill”, she retorts. The fact that I have a huge stiffy and am honestly starting to believe that this girl is DTF leads me to agree and pay the bill. I may say I was right to do this instead of calling her out and refusing to pay because I sensed it was on, but that could be me backward rationalizing a mistake which happened by chance to lead to a good thing. I still wonder whether buying the drinks was a good or bad move in the long term.

Drinks: £11.20, Total: £29.60

We dance and drink for a while. “I have to get back to my friends” she says. She’s off now she’s got the drink. Fuck that. Not on my watch. Not with the size of this erection.

I drag her into a corner and grind her hard, “Wait till you’ve finished your drink, then go back to them”. I get the kiss close moments later. I just know at this stage that I have a good chance of fucking her tonight, so I probe for logistics. Turns out her apartment is all the way over in East London.

Me: Shit, that’s a long way. How are you getting home?

Her: I don’t know, I lost my Oyster card (card for paying for travel on London’s public transport).

Me: I live close by. Just 20 minutes by taxi. You’ll have to come home with me. It’ll be for the best.

Her: I don’t know, I have to find my friends…

Me: Look, I would just take your number but my phone’s out of battery (the truth lol).

Her: That’s a shame

Me: I know. So what we need to do, is go back to my flat so I can charge my phone and we can swap numbers.

She thinks about it intensely for a few moments.

Her: Ok.

Epic.

Her: But I have to find my friends first. I’ll need to tell them.

Fail.

I know if she finds her friends my chances of a lay will plummet. She seemed to be with a fairly large group, so at least one of them will cock block, especially since she’s a little drunk. This girl’s hind brain wants to fuck me so she’s allowing any fuzzy logic that gives her plausible deniability that she’s coming to mine to fuck me to win over her fore brain. Her friends won’t be so easily convinced. We wander off to find her friends. I’m not hopeful.

It’s then that dumb luck intervenes…

To be continued.

———————————————
Stats since 1st September:
1 number closes
3 kiss closes
1 f closes

“Fuck off”.

I feel like simply getting told to fuck off as a blow out is a milestone for me. The opener was simply, “Excuse me. Are you ginger?”. My wing told me calling someone ginger was offensive. Thinking about it I can see how many people would find being called ginger rude, hence the rude blow out. Many readers to my blog may wonder how on earth I wouldn’t realise this and start to question my level of social calibration. You have to bare in mind that I adore red heads and frequent the ginger subreddit (NSFW), so for me the opener was almost a compliment opener.

Obviously this only applies to women. Ginger men are freaks.

———————————————
Stats since 1st September:
1 number closes
3 kiss closes
1 f closes

HBSexyLilDancer

Posted: September 15, 2011 in Uncategorized
Tags: ,

As usual myself and one wing (only my second time out with this guy) arrive at the club just before 9 to avoid paying the cover charge or hassle getting in. It’s already fairly busy at this time, so I have a feeling it’s going to be a good night.

We kick back and have a beer. My wing is young and eager to get going. I tell him I’m not going to bother opening sets until 10pm. Approaching and running a set can sap your energy, an I don’t want to burn out before prime time (11:30 – 1:30 IMO). I’ve seen so many wings arrive before 9, run around like mad things opening sets for a couple of hours, then bail before midnight because they get tired. This can get you some telephone numbers, but won’t get you an SNL.

My wing opens a passing 2 set as we’re stood by the bar by calling them over. There’s a tall blonde and a short brunette. I take the short brunette. We banter for a bit, and she seems interested with some IOIs coming my way, but I fuck up my response to a shit test and it dies:

Her: We’re in the White Room

Me: Posh. Do you have a big ice bucket full of champagne? That’s what they usually have in there.

Her: Yeah, but I don’t like it. I prefer vodka.

Me: I was just going to say I bet you prefer vodka. I can tell.

Her: So are you saying I’m not sophisticated?

I gave her what was supposed to be a faux guilty look, but I may have just looked like she had caught me out, therefore failing the shit test. In retrospect I should have ignored her question, grabbed her hand saying, “Show me how you move”, then spun her round, pulling her in for the lock in. Bit gamey but would pass the shit test and take the set forward at the same time.

The girls make their excuses and rejoin their friends. At this point a group of girls enters the club. One of them, an HB6 is dancing in a very sexual way as she walks by. We lock eyes for a couple of seconds. She is DTF and attracted to me, so I should definitely open her. I decide the time isn’t right yet. It’s still too early, so I let her walk on by. We’ll call her HBSexyLilDancer. I have a feeling (in my loins) that I’ll be seeing her later.

My wing opens another set in the smoking area which doesn’t come to much. Back in the club, and fast approaching 10pm I decide it’s time to open my first set, so I’m keeping my eyes open. At this time the clubs still only at 1/3rd capacity, so there isn’t much around. We’re going up some stairs as an HB9 is coming up. She’s the hottest girl I’ve seen so far so I open her. I go direct by telling her she looks gorgeous, then I ask her name. Turns out she’s here for her 19th birthday party. 10 years younger than me… Anway, the set doesn’t really hook so I let her go.

In the future I’ll open with what Rob Judge uses, “You’re adorable. I wanted to meet you.”. Although what you open with doesn’t really matter, that opener’s clever from a psychological point of view. I’ll right an entire post on it another time explaining why.

Later my wing and I are standing with our backs to the back of a booth in the golden spot. The golden spot is the spot in any bar / club which is equidistant from both the bar an the girl’s toilets. It’s a high traffic spot that’s perfect for grabbing girls on their own or in pairs as they go past.

My wing has a set that almost hooks, but not quite. I explain to him how locking the girl in against the back of the both can help in hooking sets, as it makes the girl feel like she’s having a conversation with you, rather than feeling like she’s just about to walk off.

I open  an English HB8 that’s walking by with something like, “Hey, I need to talk to you right now. It’s really important. You’re cute, what’s your name?”. It hooks moderately well, but I realise I need to lock her in if this is going to go anywhere.

The banter’s going quite well, but my wing keeps interrupting and breaking my flow. He’s trying to get her to hold his glass. He doesn’t seem to realise dominance should come via finesse, not just barking orders at a girl. Eventually the girl makes her excuses and goes back to her friends. I raise the issue of not interrupting when I’m one one one with a girl to my wing. He told me he was trying to help me lock the girl in. He told him thanks, but no help needed. I explain to him about the bubble of love (from RSD’s Tim) which exists around a guy and a girl before a pull, and how having a third person stops that bubble existing.

After some more drinks, we hit the dance floor. The English girl is there and recognizes me. My wing says I should go for it. I disagree. She’s there pulling silly dance moves with a large group of her girlfriends. And that’s what she wants to do at the moment, have fun with her friends. When she’s done that for a while and had a couple more drinks, then she’ll be ready for having fun with men instead of her girls. So much of it is about being in the right place at the right time. In retrospect I would have danced with her for a bit without any escalation, then left her. This would have created a strong possibility of reopening and easily closing later in the night.

So I’m busting my (terrible, frankly) moves on the dance floor. The place is starting to get busy. There are a reasonable number of decent girls on the dance floor at this point. As I’m browsing this vagina buffet for a target I notice HBSexyLilDancer from earlier. She can really move her body. They say that dancing is the first stage in the human mating ritual, where people dance to attract a mate. Watching her dance now this seems very true.

A quick aside on girls dancing sexy. I’ve started to notice that these fall into two categories:

  1. The attention whore
  2. The girl whose DTF

It’s hard to explain how to spot the difference between the two types, it’s just an experience thing. I can tell HBSexyLilDancer falls firmly into the DTF camp. She’s dancing like she’s the only girl in the world and no ones watching. She’s grinding her hips back and forth just for her, because she’s horny and wants to feel the music in her body, not because she wants to put a display on for the chodes.

I realise that my wing has already made his move; he’s kiss closing HBSexyLilDancer’s friend. He introduces me to her. I turn to HBSexyLilDancer.

Me: Is this your friend?

Her: Yes

Me: Cool. What’s you’re name?

Her: HBSexyLilDancer

Me: That accent…. eastern Europe?

Her: Slovakia… I’m from Slovakia. You?

Me: I’m English. I come from near London.

I take both of her hands and make strong eye contact.

Me: How long has the little Slovakian girl been in London?

Her: Two months.

Me: How many English men have you kissed since you’ve been in London?

Her: None. I have never kissed an English man.

Me: No? That’s so sad.

I move my head towards hers.

Me: You really should try it while you’re here.

I don’t even get to finish moving in for the kiss… She quickly and aggressively bridges the rest of the distance herself and we kiss. Her friend runs off and leaves my wing on his own.

We spend 5 minutes going for it on the dance floor. My hands on her tits, her hands on my cock. Girls often seem to put guys they pull on the dance floor into a box labeled, “Random Dance floor Pull”. They never answer when guys in this box call them the next day. They rarely go home with guys in this box. Obviously, you don’t want to be in this box, and this means getting them of the dance floor ASAP.

I grab her hand and start to lead her hand and start to lead her off the dance floor.

Her: Where are we going

Me: Don’t worry, just down stairs to the restaurant. It’s quiet there, and we need to talk.

Her: OK

I lead her to the restaurant where we sit in a booth and talk. Standard rapport building stuff. I have to admit, building comfort is a weak point of mine. This is especially true with non anglosphere girls. This is bad as there is plenty of girls in London who fall into this category. I just find it hard getting either wide or deep rapport with a girl who’s from somewhere like Europe or South America. I think it’s partly a language thing, partly a culture thing.

After I bit of chat we start to make out again. I put her hand on my cock and she rubs it, but stops me putting my hand up her skirt. I ask her to come home with me, she says no, because she’s not that type of girl. She asks me what I think of that type of girl, and I respond truthfully, “I think the decision to go home with a guy on the first night is down to a girl’s views on sex. I don’t think a girl’s view on sex reflects in any way on the rest of her personality, how how quality she is. In other words I don’t, unlike many guys, believe that a girl’s quality is determined by how quickly she jumps into bed with a man”. I don’t have the whole Madonna / Whore issue going on like many (even community) guys do. In retrospect, a better answer would have been, “That’s just what happens in London. People go home together the first night they meet all of the time”.

I put her hand back on my cock as I make out with her passionately. She gets really into it, and gives me a hand job under the table as I suck on her tits. After this I number close her. An important point to note here is that I didn’t ring her number to make sure I’d got it right till later in the night. Turns out I had entered it wrong the first time. Lesson learned: always ring them when you number close them to confirm the number’s been entered correctly. I tell her I’m going to take her for cocktails in Covent Garden.

After we’re done with all that my wing shows up, and we all go to smoke then I get some drinks in. We talk more and look for her friends, but she can’t find them. After a bit more dancing I’m hungry, so we leave the club and go to a Chinese restaurant. I consider bouncing her back to my flat from here, but she’s still worried about finding her friends, and when she tells me her coat is still at the club that idea is ruined.

She calls one of her friends and it turns out she’s gone to the London Eye with some men. This makes no sense, as it’ll obviously be closed at this time, but it’s random and makes me laugh. Her friend says she will get a bus home from there. This is good news for me, but there are still two of her friends left in the club. It would be preferable to me if she didn’t find them, then I can play the whole, “You’ll have to come home with me” card. We go return to the club.

As soon as we get there we hit the dance floor. She starts touching my cock again. I get turned on so drag her to a table where she wanks me off again. Then back on the dance floor for the rest of the night.

The night is drawing to an end at this point, and back in the club her sexual dancing is attracting the desperate men who haven’t managed to pull.  Despite the fact I’m obviously with her a chode crystal forms around us on the dance floor. Guys try to pull her in multiple ways: eye fucking her as she dances, booty bumping her, trying to grind her. When I’m leading her off the dance floor at the end, I feel resistance. I look back and some cheeky fucker who’d been circling us on the dance floor for the last 20 minutes has actually grabbed her hand and is trying to pull her in. Horniness will make guys bold. I tell him promptly to fuck off. He backs off. If she hadn’t of tossed me off twice already which made me more chilled out, I may well have hit the guy at that point.

As the club kicks out she gets a text. Turns out her other two friends have left. “You’ll have to come home with me then. I’m worried about the thought of you getting the bus on your own”. She’s having none of it.

At that point a fight breaks out. Some guy gets knocked out on the street right near the club, his head hitting the ground with a large cracking sound on the way down. This sends the girl into floods of tears as I ring for an ambulance. Am hoping the guys blood comes out of the white shirt I was wearing when I wash it. Certainly a dramatic end to the night.

I ring her the next evening. We arrange to have cocktails in Covent Garden in a couple of days time. She says she may have to cancel due to work. The next day she cancels via text. I ask her when she’s free, and she tells me she’s very busy this week but will let me know. That was a couple of days ago, and I haven’t text back. That last text wasn’t a good sign. The whole, “I’ll let you know when I’m free” line from a girl usually means they don’t want to see you, but that isn’t always the case. I’ll text her on Saturday and try and set something up for next week if she hasn’t contacted me. I’d say it’s 50/50 for the fclose at this point.

Looking back, the only thing I’d do differently is to make more attempts to put my hand up her skirt. I think I only made one. If I could get some fingers inside her, chances are she’d have been coming home with me so I could finish her off.

———————————————
Stats since 1st September:
1 number closes
3 kiss closes
1 f closes

How to (not) get laid

Posted: September 9, 2011 in Uncategorized
Tags: ,

There’s a club in Clapham, London. Capacity 3,500. Decor 80’s disco cheese with music to match. The girls are young and hot. It has a reputation as the biggest meat market in London. It’s name is Infernos.

It’s infamous throughout London as the club to go to when you want to get laid. The main reason I don’t go there regularly is it takes me much longer to get there and back than it does when I go to clubs in the West End. Despite this, my natural wing convinces me to spend a Saturday night there, given that last weekend he had picked up two women and had a threesome with them.

So that’s the background. I’m basically in a club which is renowned for being easy to get laid in.

I’ve been there for about 30 minutes, having a drink with the guys at the upstairs dance floor. The night is still fairly young and the place is still pretty dead, so I decide to head to the down stairs dance floor to see if it’s any busier. On my way down the stairs there is a 2 set of HB7s coming up. One of them opens me. She literally goes direct on me. Guaranteed close, right? She how the conversation between my self, HB7 and her friend panned out:

HB7: Mate, I’m not being funny but, basically, I think you’re well fit

Me: Thanks. What’s your name, sweetie?

HB7: HB7

Me: Well HB7, it’s a bit early yet. I’ll probably come and find you later (Yes, I’m aware this was retarded. No, I don’t know why I said this).

HB7: Fuck off, whenever people say that, they never do

Me: You’re fiesty aren’t you

Her: I just say what I think

Friend: Come on, let’s go

HB7: We’re going to get drinks, come with us

Me: Cool, are you buying me a drink?

HB7: OK

Friend: Fuck off! You’re not buying him a drink. He can buy you one.

HB7: Yeah you can buy me a drink

Me: I’m broke, you buy me one

Her: Ok

Friend: Fuck off. Come on, we’re going (Drags HB7 off).

Whoops.

So, in summary:

  1. Girl does direct on me in club
  2. I try and give her the brush off
  3. She ploughs
  4. I’m a cheeky bastard
  5. She puts up with it
  6. Friend finally ends it when I’m just being too cocky instead of just going to the bar with her.

It’s like god wants me to get laid but I have other plans (mainly involving internet porn and Vaseline).